The Divided Knight - Chapter Six

Zoe stood in the corridor outside Thaddeus's cell, trying to decide whether or not should should try knocking on the door. Despite the lateness of the hour, she could sense that, much like herself, he was having trouble sleeping. Unlike her, however, Thaddeus was having trouble sleeping because of how angry the things Zoe and the Abbott had told him had made him, and that was what made her hesitant to knock. What would he do if she did? Would he open the door, only to slam it in her face once he realized who it was that had knocked? Would he even answer? Would he, perhaps, let her in?

Zoe had always considered herself a rational person, never one to let her emotions dictate the decisions she made or the actions she took. The most rational outcomes to her knocking on Thaddeus's door, she reasoned, were either him slamming the door in her face, or him not answering, at all. Neither of those were the outcomes she wanted. She wanted him to let her in. She wanted to talk to him – not as a cleric of the Order of Catharzen, but as a friend, just like she had back in the days when Thaddeus had visited her at The Sated Dragon. I wasn't a friend, then, though, Zoe thought. I was a liar, no matter what my reasons for the deception.

Zoe almost turned away from Thaddeus's cell, then, almost returned to her own – where she knew no sleep would be found – but paused when she thought, again, of how different Thaddeus looked, now, compared to when he had left the abbey all those years ago. He still had the same mop of unruly brown hair, even if it had started to go a bit gray at the temples, and his eyes still held the same spark of life they always had, but he was no longer just the lonely boy who had come to Zoe's inn looking for company other than that of the monks to share his dinners with. Thaddeus had become a man, since then, and, if Zoe allowed herself the boldness of the thought, quite a handsome one, at that. That shouldn't make any difference! Zoe thought, annoyed at herself, but it kept her from leaving all the same.

Sighing and shaking her head, Zoe approached the door to Thaddeus's cell and knocked. There was no immediate answer, and Zoe nearly turned away, but then, there was the click of a latch, followed by the door being pulled open from the inside. Thaddeus stood in the doorway, his form silhouetted from behind by candlelight, and, for the first time, Zoe realized he was almost a foot taller than he had been when he'd left the abbey.

“Zoe?” Thaddeus said. “What do you want? Shouldn't you be asleep?”

His tone was gruff, but not nearly as bad as Zoe had feared, and she felt herself relax. “That's a question I could ask you, too, Thad,” she said. “We have an early morning, tomorrow.”

“I know, but did you really expect me to be able to sleep after what you told me, earlier? Is that why you're here, now? Because you left something out?”

“No, Thad, it isn't. I wanted to see if you were all right. To see if you needed someone to talk to.”

Thaddeus looked at her for a moment. “Just like the old days, huh? Back when I was fourteen or fifteen and had a bad day of lessons and chores with the monks? Zoe, if I'd known, then, what I do, now, the talks we used to have would never have happened. You realize that, don't you?”

The words made Zoe feel like she'd been slapped. This was an outcome of her knocking she hadn't planned for, but, she realized, was actually the most rational of all. He has every right to be angry. I should just go. “Yes, I do,” she said, immediately angry at how close to tears she felt, which only made the feeling worse. “I'm sorry. I shouldn't have bothered you.”

Zoe turned to leave, but, before she got very far, she felt Thaddeus place his hand on her shoulder. His grasp was gentle – not that of a person who was angry, at all – and the gruffness was gone from his voice when he said, “Wait.”

Zoe turned back to him, but said nothing. She had to blink to keep her vision from swimming, and silently cursed the tears that slipped down her cheeks when she did.

“Zoe, I don't know if things can be like they used to be,” Thaddeus said. “So much has changed since then. I know things I didn't, then. Things about you. Things about me. Things about this place. There is, though, one thing that hasn't changed. I still need a friendly face to talk to, and I remember that you were always that. So, I'm willing to give it a try.”

Zoe had to blink, again, and it was a few moments before she found her voice. “You are?”

“Yes,” he said. “Yes, I think so.” Thaddeus glanced over his shoulder, then looked back at her. “Did you . . . did you want to come in? There isn't a whole lot of room . . .”

Zoe laughed, reaching up to brush at her cheeks. “That's okay,” she said. “I'm sure I can find room.”

Thaddeus ushered her into the room, keeping his hand on her shoulder until she was inside. Then, he closed the door and moved to sit in the chair behind the desk, gesturing for Zoe to take the bed. As she sat, Zoe took note of two things – Thaddeus's sword, resting in its scabbard against the wall at the foot of the bed, and the open book on his desk. The sword unsettled her, especially since she knew that the Eltaran soul within it was awake and no doubt taking note of everything that happened around it, but she found the open book the real oddity – since when had Thaddeus actually wanted to read anything?

“Thad?” Zoe said. “Were you reading?”

Thaddeus smiled. “I was trying to. Thought it might put me to sleep.” His eyes moved to the sword for a brief moment. “Oh, and don't worry about Aylander. He's awake, but has decided to give us some privacy.”

Zoe raised an eyebrow. “Privacy? Oh, so is that what we need, now?”

Thaddeus didn't answer right away, and had to clear his throat before speaking, something that amused Zoe to no end. “Well, you know what I meant,” he said. “He wanted us to be able to talk without having someone listening in to what we were saying.”

“Uh-huh. Thaddeus, do you know how special that sword of yours is? Not every Eltaran Sword Priest used to carry one like it. Only a very few had the honor, and when Solanas was given his – the only human to have ever been given an Eltaran sword – it nearly caused the True to break off their allegiance with the Torvarans. The only reason they didn't was because their leaders understood how much they needed Solanas to help them defeat Atraxos. Solanas did great things with that sword. With that sword, he helped turn the tide, but was never able to claim the ultimate prize with it.”

“Which was?” Thaddeus asked.

“Atraxos's soul, itself. No one knows what might have happened had he been able to.”

“Well, for starters, I doubt we'd be here talking about it. If Solanas had been able to capture Atraxos's soul with his Blade, that would have ended Atraxos for good. He would never have been able to come back.”

“More than likely. Thad, you do know that it wasn't the Soul of the Conclave that gave you your sword, right?”

Thaddeus nodded. “I know, Zoe. You said earlier that it was Solanas's ghost. It's incredible to think, though, that it was nothing more than a ghost that was looking over the Conclave all these years. I mean, it was so powerful.”

“Even in death, Solanas's power never really waned. I even think, now, that he may have cast a spell before he died that made sure his spirit would maintain a modicum of his living ability.”

“Do you think the sword his spirit gave me is his sword?”

Zoe glanced over at Thaddeus's sword. “I suppose it's possible,” she said. “None of the sources I've read ever mentioned what happened to Solanas's sword after he died.” Acting on a sudden impulse – which wasn't like her, at all – Zoe reached over and passed her hand over Thaddeus's sword, testing it for enchantments beyond those she already knew it contained. Luckily, it turned out not to have any enchantments designed to defend against her probing – if it had, the results would have been . . . uncomfortable, to say the least – but it did have other kinds of spells woven into it. “Well, that's odd,” Zoe said, pulling her hand back.

“What's odd?” Thaddeus asked.

“It seems that, if your sword really was Solanas's – which I'm beginning to think is more than a little likely – he put some additional enchantments on it beyond those it was forged with.” She looked at Thaddeus. “Enchantments that I can't decipher.”

“So you don't know what else it could be capable of?”

“No idea, at all.”

Thaddeus looked at his sword. “I'm not sure I like the sound of that.”

“You shouldn't,” Zoe said. “I sure as Hel don't like the feel of it.”

“Zoe?”

“Yes, Thad?”

“What if it wasn't Solanas who put those extra enchantments on it?”

That was impossible. Wasn't it? “I don't know who else could have,” Zoe said.

The two of them fell silent for a moment, and then, suddenly, Thaddeus began to laugh.

“What's so funny?” Zoe asked.

“You wanted to be sure I was all right,” Thaddeus said, trying to get a hold of his laughter. “That's why you came down here to talk to me. Zoe, I wasn't all right, before, and I'm even less all right, now.”

But Zoe knew that he actually was, could sense that his anger was much less than it had been before she'd come in, and that he was considerably more relaxed. The fact that she had uncovered enchantments she didn't understand on Thaddeus's sword scared him – it scared her, too, as it had been a very long time since she had come across an enchantment she didn't immediately recognize – but he was all right, and he'd be able to sleep once she'd left. She'd be able to sleep, too, and she looked forward to seeing him in the morning, when they left the abbey together and headed east toward the Ivory Spires.

Thank you for coming to talk to him, Healer.

That voice was the voice of the Eltaran inside Thaddeus's sword, the one who called himself Aylander. Zoe, who had returned Aylander to the sword when the meeting in the great hall earlier had ended, shouldn't have been able to hear it, and, even if she had, should not have been the only one. Thaddeus showed no sign of having heard the voice, however, as he still sat in the chair behind the desk, shaking his head and chuckling to himself.

It's the other enchantments in the Blade, Aylander said. Not even I understand them, but, somehow, they are what is making it possible for me to communicate with you and not have Thaddeus hear. Again, Healer, thank you for coming to talk to him. He needed a friend, something to anchor him to some semblance of normalcy.

He still thought of me like that? Zoe thought. Even after all the Abbott and I told him, earlier?

Oh, yes. He is angry that the truth was not told to him, before, and I do believe he would rather not have any further dealings with your Abbott, but seeing you, again, has made him happy in a way that would be best for him to explain, further.

Zoe had to fight to keep her expression from betraying how she felt. What way is that?

Aylander chuckled. That is not my place to say, Lady Zoe. Good night.